Routine Deviation 

One yellow lamp barely lights half the room, a small T.V. is playing a soap opera. They are sitting

on the couch.

– Do I have to kill you right now?

– What?

– I mean if I did, it would be god’s will, right? Nothing happens outside of his will.

– Did you eat something bad?

– No, it just occurred to me, if everything is predestined, then, if I, say, strangled you now and was executed, I would be acting out god’s will.

– No, god only knows what will happen, and cut it out.

– So, what does he know?

– ……..

– Honey, it’s been fucking absurd, do you know why I married you?

– Why, fuck face?

– I was fat and poor, I couldn’t get a girlfriend, I was 32 and still a virgin, lust was eating through my flesh, and it still does, you were available, when we fuck I always imagine I’m with a girl from my high school, what the hell are we doing?

She looked at him with contempt bordering on malevolence.

– Fucking? You mean your attempts to stimulate me with your pathetic little cock?

– At least I try.

– What the fuck do you want, Sammie?

– Here is what I think, one of us should commit suicide so the other can collect the insurance money and begin a new life, die in a car crash or something.

– Who?

– Should we flip a coin?

Fine by me.

She looked at him with eyes made of fire.

I’m going for a walk.

Drop by the store and get some milk.

And condoms? Should I get some condoms?

Five seconds

– Yes.


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